It was always a thrill for me to sit and listen to parents talk about their relationship and how they met. Gone are the days when you see a woman, liked her and then approached her with roses, asked her out, and that was it.
Things are so much more complicated. Most are resorting to Dating sites, my grandparents are gone now, but I can hear my grandpa saying, “really”?
You have been friends for a while now, there is something about being around each other that makes it all worthwhile, you could be with this person in a serious relationship, but what if it doesn’t work, it would ruin the friendship, but in truth, some things are worth the risk. Moving from platonic to a romantic relationship.
Make sure you want this.
So, you think you want something serious with this special someone—but before you do anything else, make sure you want to go from casual to a committed relationship. There are just some questions you need to ask yourself. Do I feel validated with this person, do they respect my point of view, can I be myself with this person?
All these questions are good, but there has to be a balance because you have to feel good even if this person is not around; it suggests that you have something to offer.
What are we?
Labelling too early could ruin things; remember that if you care about someone that much and they care about you too, there is no need to establish labels; for some, it is a turnoff.
Let things progress naturally and look at the evidence: Do they try to see you whenever they’re free? Do they seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? Do they have as much fun on dates as you do? Yes, yes, and yes? Well, great: These are likely signs they’re in it for real, so enjoy being with them and relax about making things “official.”
“People who are wary of commitment want to feel like they’re the one choosing to be with you—they don’t want to feel like they’re being coaxed into a cage,” says Terri Trespicio, a lifestyle and relationship expert based in New York City.
Take Your Time on the Subject
You have been thinking about it for a while, so you finally got the chance to be with this special someone alone, you want to get it out, but before you check out the mood, see if there is anything on their mind, ease yourself into the conversation, it is essential to set the tone. Nothing is worse than putting your heart on a platter for someone, and they are really? It is always great when you can define what you want without giving an ultimatum.
Playing Hard to Get
It is always difficult to tell when someone is playing hard to get, or they are not serious about you, “I do not feel the same” are not words you want to hear, but in truth, some play hard to get. Too many times, I hear big men cry because they never came right out and said their truth, only to be told that the other person liked them just as much, but someone did not step up.
Stay true to Yourself.
It is always so sad to see men and women reinvent themselves when they meet someone they are attracted to the person. It’s easy to let parts of yourself go when you meet someone you think is the partner of your dreams. But don’t.
“Trying to be someone you’re not is so transparent,” says Kelman, another relationship expert. Not to mention—and this is important! A deserving partner (and you too, for that matter) should celebrate your personality, quirks and all. So, if you’d instead go to the gynaecologist than watch football or hit an art museum, don’t pretend to love the Warriors or understand abstract art just because the person you’re seeing is a fan. Who can resist not loving the Warriors, Steph Curry is good.
Be Selfless.
From Platonic to Romantic
Show you genuinely care about someone is the key to anyone’s heart. You will not bend over backwards to suit anyone, but you can do the best you can without stepping out of your comfort area. If you feel you have to extend over to impact someone, then maybe that is not for you.